Relationships 101

I went to see my friend Jeremy and his band play a show lastnight. I've known this girl for a long time and recently thought to myself that I might like to ask her on a date. Instead of saying, "do you want to go on a date with me?" I just skirt around it by asking her on friendly outings which would be fine but we've been friends for 6 years and at some point enough is enough. So I asked her on a "friend outing" to see the show lastnight. She said no.

So I go to the show by myself and at one point I went outside to make a phone call. While outside I noticed a very attractive girl sitting down by herself. Whenever I looked at her she would smile at me. I finish my phone call and proceed to go back inside. As she is sitting close to the door I pass very close to her on my way in. She looks me in the eyes and smiles again. I smile and just walk on in. During the next band's performance she ends up standing right in front of me. I find that she is turning around and smiling more than the average person smiles while looking at me. In my head I'm saying to myself, "why don't you talk to her you moron?" Later on I looked around for her but she was gone. My chance was over.

Why did I not ask the first girl what I really wanted to ask? Why didn't I talk to the beautiful girl who was smiling at me? I don't know. I guess for the same reason Peter, Michael and Samir work at Initech.

So lesson number 1 is don't do what I do.

In a somewhat related story my friend Jeremy is now playing guitar for a guy named Jonathan Clay. It was his show I was at lastnight. The music is very John Mayer-ish which (sorry Jeremy) I'm not really into but if anyone likes that sort of thing or just wants to make fun of Jeremy you can check them out at the following:

www.myspace.com/jonathanclay

www.jonathanclay.com

Also, my garage door opener finally works. The guy who fixed it was here from 9:00 to 12:00 tonight. Classic McClain Saturday night. I'm going to bed now. Hopefully my self esteem will be higher tomorrow. Goodnight.

She Left Me Roses By The Stairs ...

I'm back baby! I've been out of pocket for a few weeks but the two or three of you who read here will be happy to know I should now be a little more regular ... in my postings. I actually tried to post about a week ago but somehow lost the post somewhere between writing and posting it to the site. Not sure what happened and I was disappointed to lose such great material, but thus it goes. If I remember anything I said I'll just stick it in here. The title of this post is actually from that one because I remember having a really crappy day at work that day.

So I went on vacation a few weeks ago to NW Arkansas. Why is it that that place along with all of Texas that lies west of I-45 is so far behind the rest of the world. Everyone on the lakes here seems to wakeboard, wakesurf or wakeskate now on these really sweet I/O wakeboarding boats that probably cost almost as much as my house. But in Arkansas they are all still on skies being pulled behind little wooden motorboats. I don't get it. One cool thing about being 20 years behind the rest of the world was being able to pull into a gas station and have a guy come out and pump the gas for you. Name a place west of I-45 that has happened lately. Anyways, I came back from Arkansas and basically went straight to the closing table on the house. The past week and a half have been given over to cleaning, moving and then unpacking with various phone calls to all the local utility, cable, city of, etc. sorts of companies. I'm thoroughly enjoying the new place and hope to have some pictures soon of what it looks like now that it is furnished.

Question ... (remembering from the lost post) does anyone else find themselves whistling, humming or singing Christmas songs in July or any other month that is not December? This happens to me all the time. If it happens to you, what songs are you singing? For some reason the other day I found myself humming that "Winter Wonderland" song. It was like 102 degrees outside at the time. Wishful thinking I guess. That was a new one for me though. I usually whistle Jingle Bell Rock. I don't know why I love that song so much. Maybe it's because it makes me think of Christmas with a distortion pedal plugged in. Who knows. But it's a great song and I always find myself spontaneously whistling it.

Another question ... I know a lot of times in movies that take place in the suburbs, if someone new moves into the neighborhood the current residents usually stop by with a plate of cookies or something similar and introduce themselves. Does this happen in real life? Because so far, no cookies. I'm not supposed to go over to their houses am I? That sounds a little too needy for me.

I had the best margarita of my life tonight. Every sip was like taking a shot of tequila. San Miguel's in McKinney.

Alanis Morrisette is on Kimmel right now but instead of singing, he is interviewing her. Bad idea. Not so interesting.

That's all. I'm going to bed so I can get up and do it all over again tomorrow.

... Suprises let me know she cares.

A 5th on the 4th

Tonight I was shooting firworks with friends and family ... long story short, one of the artillery shell launchers fell over after the shell was lit and was aiming at everyone watching the little show we had going. Good news was no one was hit. Bad news was the shell exploded on the roof of my aunt and uncle's house. It was a little touch and go as to whether or not the place was going to go up in flames. The sparks died though and the show went on.

What a great holiday.

HAPPY 4TH

I don't mean to stereotype anyone based simply on appearance but is this not the gayest bunch of firework technicians you've ever seen? I could go on and on but I won't. Just so you know who's behind the fence firing artillery shells at your local fireworks show this year. Happy 4th of July ... and a special bonus pack to anyone who can explain the difference between a firecracker and a firework. That one has baffled me for years. Enjoy your Roman Candle fights and if you need something with a little more kick a shoulder mounted PVC pipe with an artillery shell inside can really do some damage to one of your buddies on the other team. Not that I know from experience or anything.