LITTLE SISTER BROUGHT HER NEW BOYFRIEND ...

I loves me some Christmas. Love it. So much so that I end up with an inevitable Christmas hangover the next day which is why I took off from work and just laid in bed forever. All the food, family and fun are great but can definitely wear on you once it's all over. They obviously have no affect on my use of ridiculous alliteration though. So I love Christmas because it starts sometime during my Thanksgiving Day nap and ends for me sometime around 10:00 p.m. on Dec. 25. I also love that on Christmas Day everything totally shuts down. No shopping. No eating out (except for IHOP apparently). No nothing. And I love Christmas because not only does it remind me how great my family and friends are, but more importantly it reminds me of how funny they are. So here are a few stories for your amusement.

My family is great. And there are a lot of things they know a lot about ... but wine is not one of them. I readily admit to knowing nothing of wine myself ... but this stuff still makes me laugh. Sometime long ago in a land far, far away someone in my family had a glass of White Zinfandel. They found it to be very delicious and now for whatever reason it is considered the wine of all wines at family gatherings. Again, I know nothing of wine except really that this stuff is not good. In fact I would venture to say it's somewhere among the lowest of the low. But most in my family love it so that's what we drink. Even from a box if that's what's available. So fast forward from long ago in a land far, far away to Christmas Day 2006 at my grandparents. The only bottle of wine in the house oddly enough is a bottle of white wine ... Chardonnay I think. This is announce and my uncle immediately gets up from his chair and in a sort of heroic manner announces that he'll be right back with "the good stuff." He only lives about 500 yards down the road so he returned shortly with White Zinfandel in hand and the day was saved. Everyone was happy and the white wine could live to see another day.

On this same Christmas Day my cousin Leigh (it was also her 18th birthday) received a new Honda Civic from my grandparents. It's been a sort of tradition in our family for our grandparents to purchase a car for each of us at some point. It usually happens during college so Leigh and everyone else was definitely surprised to see it roll up with a big bow on it. So later in the morning my aunt, uncle (not Leigh's parents) and I go with Leigh to take the car for a spin. She asks were we can go and I suggest the convenience store for a little joke. So Leigh go's inside and buys several scatch off lottery tickets and a pack of Salem Lights. When we walk back into the living room where the rest of the family is gathered she tosses the lottery tickets to her mom and says, "could you hold these while I open my cigarettes? ... and oh, by the way, I'm getting married and there's nothing you can do about it." It was priceless. And possibly the comedic hit of the day.

Later that night I had Christmas with my more immediate family including my neice and nephews. I opened my present from my 6 year old twin nephews to find a shot glass checkers game ... complete with 26 shot glasses inside. Sam (twin #1) immediately starts to tell me that I can put my favorite drink in the glasses and the Eli (twin #2) proceeds to tell me the glasses are for juice. I loved it. Kids are really great. I'm sure in about 10 or 12 years they'll be digging through boxes in my basement looking for that thing.

All in all it was a great Christmas. I got some pretty sweet things I'd been wanting and felt like I got the chance to give some pretty great presents myself. It was a great time with family and a needed break from work. Hope yours was just as holly and just as jolly.

A BUSINESS QUESTION FOR THE SALVATION ARMY

I was walking into Kroger today to buy groceries to the tune of an obnoxious bell being rung by a salvation army volunteer. It got me to thinking about the future success or failure of this type of fundraising. You see, if I had wanted to donate money to this person's bucket I would have been unable to do so. Why? Because I never have loose change. And why don't I have loose change? Because I never use cash. My options were to donate a 20 dollar bill or not donate at all. Again, I'm all for helping the less fortunate, but I can't afford to drop a 20 every time I walk into Kroger, Wal-Mart, the mall, etc. Now I doubt that we will ever get to a point where we have absolutely no cash ... but I think it is not out of line to assume that much less cash is used these days ... at least in certain areas and among certain people. I use a debit card for everything. It's just like cash but I don't have to worry about losing my money or what to do with loose change. So anyways, my thought was that the Salvation Army should set their bell ringers up with debit machines so people could go by, swipe their cards, enter an amount and be on their way. I think they could make a lot more money. Just a thought though.

Something else I've wondered about is the effect of DVR and Tivo on the advertising and television industries. I finally got DVR and it is amazing. The thing I've noticed and love is the fact that I can watch shows whenever I want without commercials. So now instead of making sure I'm home at a certain time to watch a certain show I just have the DVR set, go about my business and then watch the shows when I have free time throughout the week. An hour show is now only 40 minutes so I actually save time. I don't miss commercials at all, but I can't help but notice that companies paid a lot of money for the 20 minutes of advertising during the 1 hour show that more and more people are not watching. The simple way I've always understood how the advertising companies and television companies relate and do business is they use the period of "sweeps" to determine advertising rates for the coming period. So if a show is DVR'd in a household I wonder if it counts towards the number of households watching a certain show. Because if it is then the numbers will be skewed and advertising companies will be paying to broadcast a message to people who are fast forwarding through it. I wonder what the long term effect of this will be. It's obvious that television advertising will have to be less important so I wonder where advertising companies will pick up the slack. Internet? Billboards? Something totally new that I haven't even heard of before? Who knows. Anyways, just some things I was wondering about. Thoughts?

FANTASY WORLD

I started playing fantasy baseball in 2002. We've kept the same league going since that time and aside from the sports aspect of it, it provides a way to stay in contact with some friends I wouldn't get to see or talk to otherwise. My fantasy baseball league is filled with some of the biggest sports nerds you will ever see. I would trust several of these guys to take GM positions with major league teams and hold their own. My fortune in this fantasy baseball league so far has not been so great though. Lots of finishes somewhere in the 4th through 8th slots.

One year I played fantasy basketball but it sucked so I stopped doing that. This season was my first attempt at fantasy football. I'm in a league with a few guys I know but for the most part I have no idea who the others dudes are I'm playing against. Wasn't sure how I would like it, but it's turning out okay. That could be partially due to the fact that my team is pretty awesome. In fact, I'm writing this post because from now until the end of the Monday night football game will be the most important matchup of my fantasy sports career. I come into the playoffs with my highest ranking of any fantasy sports team I've run. I'm in second place which secured me a first round bye last week so this week I'll be playing in the semifinal round of the playoffs. I've only been in the semis once before and that was on a fluke of an upset several years ago against my roomate Jason in fantasy baseball. I was easily whipped in the semi final round that year and my season was over. This year is a different story. So far it's been a season for the ages for the Helldorado Owens team which is part of the overall TBA Inc. We drafted Ladanian Tomlinson with our first pick and that guy has pretty much carried the team. Not sure if you heard but lastweek he broke the single season touchdown record. That doesn't hurt if he's on your team. Drew Brees was my backup QB and again, not sure if you've noticed, but he's pretty awesome and has permanently taken the job from Brady.

Anyways, all that to say ... root for Helldorado Owens this weekend as we take on Shut up T.O. for our chance at our first championship appearance in team history. It's going to be a great one. Hope you have your tickets because it's not on t.v. You know ... because it's just fantasy football.

IT'S OFFICIAL ...

I'm sick. Anyone want to bring me some Nyquil so I don't have to go get it myself. I'll pay a delivery fee. Name your price.

You want to know the worst kind of being sick ... with the exception of the kind that kills you of course ... ? It's the kind where you are too sick to feel worth a crap, but not sick enough to not go to work. That was my day today. Unless something changes though it looks like I'll be having the best kind of sickness tomorrow. That's the kind where you can't go to work. Here's to hopin'.

FOND MEMORIES OF A CHRISTMAS PAST

Today while fighting the urge to jab a pencil in my eye during my trip to Wal-Mart I was reminded of a favorite Christmas of mine. My memories of Christmas as a child and specifically as it related to presents was all about receiving gifts. First it was gifts from Santa that he left out the night before Christmas. Then as my sister and I grew a little older it was gifts from Santa that for some reason weren't under the tree when we woke up but according to our mother, Santa had until 10:00 a.m. on Christmas morning to get all the presents out and since we were obviously towards the end of his run we had better go back to bed and close our doors so Santa could deliver the presents. Low and behold when we came out 30 minutes later there were presents from Santa under the tree. Then finally sometime around my senior year in high school the gig was finally up (thank goodness) and we just got presents from our parents and family. The point of this is that we got presents. As kids, that was our focus. Getting presents. To be honest with you I can't remember the first year I got a present for someone else. I know it was at a fairly young age because I remember going with my grandparents or an aunt and uncle to pick something out for my mother. As my sister and I got older we bought a few more presents. Mom, step dad, grandparents, each other. We have a big family that always spends Christmas together and the adults always bought at least one present for everyone in the group. Being in high school and college I didn't really have the money to do this but stuck to my process of going in with my sister to buy presents for those closest to us.

I graduated college in December 2000. I moved to Austin a few weeks later and a few weeks after that quit my first job. I had already signed a lease on an apartment so I found any job I could. I ended up taking a job at Dillards working in the mens department. I worked that entire year making barely enough money to make ends meet each month. As the end of that first year on my own came to a close I decided it was time to be an adult and find a way to get presents for everyone. My sister and I as always went in together on presents to help with the costs but neither of us were in a position to spend much money. So we got creative. One of the designers at my store was giving away large golf umbrellas for people who purchased $50 or more. The rep told me I was welcome to have one of my own so I took one with me after work thinking this will make a great present. No one bought that particular type of clothing so a few weeks later there were a ton of umbrellas left. I figured if it will make one good present then it will make two.

My grandpa loves old country and western music. He would always complain though about records having only a song or two that he liked and that he usually didn't like the way they were played anymore. So I used Morpheus to download 16 of his favorite songs. It actually took more effort than it sounds like as this was the beginning of the music pirating era. He loved the gift.

The point of it all was to finally focus less on what people were giving me and more on what I could give other people. The examples I just gave you may sound comical but to be honest it was one of my best Christmas'. I had to work in Austin the day before and the day after Christmas so I had less than 24 hours to spend with my family on Christmas, but during the weeks of waiting to be home for Christmas I was able to take what little means I had and turn it into gifts for those I loved. They really weren't great gifts I guess but it meant a lot to me to be able to give them and to make the sacrifice to do so. I make a little more money now than I did back then so I'm able to purchase more attractive gifts these days. And although it's still a joy to give I just don't get the same feeling I got that Christmas. It was one of my best ever and I'll always remember it.

I KNOW, I KNOW ...

Enough already. I get it. It's been forever since I've posted anything here. Why don't you sue me already. (is that how you spell "sue"? It seems like it should be different than the name "sue". Maybe not) Anyways, sorry for not writing more. Oddly enough this seems to be a trend among my few friends who are nerdy enough to keep a blog. By the way, every time I write or say the word "blog" I think of Randy Galloway saying "bbbllllog". Funny.

I feel like there has been a lot going on over the past few months. Lots of changes. New stuff. And sometimes too much stuff makes it too overwhelming to put into a few paragraphs every so often. So here are few random things to further bore you as you zone out in front of your computer screen.

First of all ... I took a big step a few months ago. I'm now a household of two. Now let's not jump to conclusions. It wasn't that big of a step. I just got a dog. Her name is Chloe. She's a 3 year old Golden Retriever. I got her from a family who had to get rid of her which is which first of all is why her name is "Chloe" ... not that it's a bad name ... but that's probably not my first choice. I've decided now to tell people that she was named after a certain blonde editor of "The Torch". She's a pretty cool dog and she seems to really like living here. She went from spending all her time (even nights) outside in a backyard to being able to sleep inside, be as lazy as she wants, and have lots of doggy friends to play with from time to time. Pretty good life for a dog.

I went to see some friends from Austin play a show lastnight at The Cavern on lower Greenville. Let me tell you something about thursday night shows when it is 20 degrees and snowing in Dallas. Not many people show up. And by not many people I mean myself, my friend Jaime, the bar staff, and the other band. It was good to hang out with friends that I don't see very often though.

On a completely different note ... I was in Kroger the other day getting groceries and I witnessed a person who is quite possibly the faster sacker of groceries I've ever seen. Want to know why this is noteworthy? Because she only had one arm! As I looked up in the checkout line to see her start bagging I though "why would they give this poor one armed girl a job where it is obviously beneficial to have two arms?" And then it was like Clark Kent went to town on my groceries. They were all in the bag and back in the shopping cart before I even knew what happened. I was amazed. So she is my new favorite Kroger employee.

Tyrone is my new favorite Whataburger employee.

Okay, it's time for me to go eat some delicious Mexican food. I promise a little more serious update on life around here in the near future. Until then ...